Thomas McKenzie
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Why do I care?


I've been thinking more about this Paul Zahl thing. And I'm wondering "why do I care?"

I ask this because several people have responded and basically said "talking about this isn't good, just leave things alone." And, in a way, I agree. This really is none of my business, except secondarily as an alum of the school. Gossip is evil, and one could argue I'm just engaging in gossip.

So, why do I care? Well, I care about Paul. And I care about the school. And I care that the alumni community seems fine to let it all go.

But what is going on in ME that I care? I think I've figured it out. One person who responded said that this is just like when a pastor abruptly leaves a church. I think that is why it has hooked me.

I have been in a church when the pastor just walked out. Literally, here one day and gone the next (which Paul is definitely not doing). In that circumstance, the bishop just told us to shut up and not talk about it. The congregation was told nothing, and it was a full year before there was even an official meeting at which the congregation was allowed to voice its feelings. By that time, what was left except a vague bitterness?

I have also been in a church in which it was not a "good fit" (what a funny expression for pain) and I needed to leave fairly abruptly (mid school year). In that case, I was not the pastor but the youth minister. When I told people I was leaving, some were sad. However, most people were pretty much "oh, OK, see ya." No one raised a fuss.

When I saw that Paul was leaving, I wanted to say "hey, this guy matters, what is going on?" partially because no one did that for me. And, really, I think I needed someone to do that for me. I needed someone to notice, someone to show some anger.

So, I think that is what's going on with me. If I have gossiped, I am sorry. Thanks for listening.

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